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Jun 18, 2013, 7:04am

Any Port in a Storm :: Warehouse District and Beyond :: Free Clinic :: Aging Parents

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Topic: Aging Parents (Read 20,299 times)

kimby
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Joined: Feb 2009
Gender: Female

Posts: 5,380
Location: Montana & Florida, USA

Re: Aging Parents
« Reply #630 on Jun 9, 2012, 5:02pm »

For the page break:

Jun 9, 2012, 3:01pm, kimby wrote:

This is a very long but comprehensive accounting of how things are with my parents, put together by my sister who has done a wonderful job of making it possible for them to stay in their home.

I've made it a spoiler so it doesn't take up so much space. Reading it makes me both happy and sad.

[spoiler=Care and Feeding of our Parents]Subject: "Care and Feeding" of our Parents

A couple of notes:
On the days that Meals on Wheels are scheduled to come, if you decide to take Mom and Dad out and will not be at the house between the hours of 11:00 am and 1:00 pm (they deliver at different times each day), you MUST call the Senior Center and either cancel the meal or arrange to pick up the meal. They get very concerned if they try to deliver a scheduled meal and no one is home!

Mom and Dad love to go out to eat. In (home village), their favorite is DeBroux's on the corner of Jefferson and Main. Dad loves their 15-bean soup. Usually they have a bartender, so they like to have an Old Fashioned with dinner (but they will suck it down before their meal arrives, so order a diet coke or sprite for them to have with their meal!). They also like the Firefly for lunch -- it's a really nice coffee shop on Main Street. They only serve lunch, though, and have a limited menu. It's also a nice place for you to go for lunch if you want a break while they are eating their Meals on Wheels! I'm taking them to Maria's Pizza tonight. They also like the Chinese Buffet on the North side of town (between the Walgreen's and the Burger King) -- I left a coupon on the counter for this. And, they like Subtown Deli on the South Side of town. I have found that you need to coach them through what they want (make sure you confirm what sides, etc., that they want) and then that you place the order for them. Dad is very soft-spoken and can't get out his order easily, making it frustrating for all involved, so it's just easier if you make sure what he wants (I usually give him a few suggestions that I know he'll like) and then place his order for him. If you are in (nearby big city), they love the Outback Steakhouse (address & directions provided). If you plan to go there, it would be really nice to call (their old friend) S****K******, who lives a few blocks away from there, and see if he can join you.

Dad has a hard time getting seat belts on, so it's easier to just help him into the car, fasten his seat belt and close the door. Mom can do her own usually as long as the end is easily found on the seat (and as long as Nellie isn't sitting on it!)

MAKE SURE IF YOU TAKE NELLIE ANYWHERE IN THE CAR THAT THERE IS A HEDGEHOG TOY IN THE CAR!!!!! I'LL LEAVE ONE IN THE SUBARU. THIS IS VERY VERY VERY VERY IMPORTANT. IF NO HEDGEHOG, SHE WILL CHEW UP ANYTHING IN SITE -- INCLUDING THE BRAND NEW TWICE-REPLACED SEAT BELT!!!! SHE WILL ALSO BE VERY UPSET FOR THE WHOLE TIME SHE IS IN THE CAR. Nellie needs help getting in and out of the car. She can get her front paws up and in, but needs a little butt-nudge. It's good to help her out, otherwise she may jump from the seat to the ground, hitting it pretty hard and sometimes falling. We do not need any broken bones on her! I'm convinced that Nellie is 100% deaf, so don't even try calling her, etc. There are leashes on the kitchen counter. Be sure to bring one with you to the cabin.

As far as RX, D*** will have the pill trays ready for us to take to the cabin. They are in the cabinet above where Mom keeps her purse. Be sure to bring them and the eyedrop bottles, plus Nellie's pills (aspirin and Glucosamine) and Pill Pockets, to the cabin. They get their morning pills with breakfast and their evening pills with supper. Nellie gets 1/2 aspirin and a Glucosamine (each in a Pill Pocket molded around the pill) in the morning. We can stop the eye salve next Monday, so you won't need to worry about that. At nighttime, either give them each their eyedrops, or put the bottles on their pillows so they remember to do it.

I ordered Tangee lipstick for Mom from the Vermont Country Store (she only has 1 tube left -- it was in her purse, I moved it to her drawer in the bathroom). It should come about the time Kimby is there. Her hair curler at the cabin is broken (I think I threw it away, but not sure). The one at home works. She looks so much nicer when she has her hair curled (but she doesn't do it) and she loves having her hair played with, so curl away!

There is clean cabin laundry in R***'s room at home that Kimby and Mr. Kimby should take to the cabin (towels, etc.) C**** is also doing some cabin laundry which may or may not be ready before then.

Things Dad obsesses about:
Electric Razors and Chargers. He has many. There are 2 razors that seem to work - the cords/chargers are in the drawer in the bathroom below where he puts his razors. He doesn't seem to be getting a good shave, though. Maybe Mr. Kimby can suggest a better razor or see if his need sharpening or replacing.
Glasses. They really frustrate him - it seems like they never are "aimed" right for either close or long distance, even though I have had them adjusted at the clinic several times. They do get bent when he falls (I just had them adjusted yesterday at the Optometrist's office). He also loses them a lot. Usually they can be found on his headboard (either at home or cabin), on the kitchen table, in a pocket of what he recently wore, or in one of the plastic bins next to the couch. Whenever you find something for Dad you get big "hero points" and he thinks you are wonderful and have excellent "finder" skills.
Hearing Aid. Look in the same places. Sometimes he needs help putting it in. There are batteries on the kitchen table at home and in a paper bag on Mom's chair in a little blue case at the cabin in their bedroom.
"When is everyone coming?" No matter which daughter is there, he'll be wondering when the other one/ones are coming and will assume that they are coming today unless you remind him otherwise.
"When are we going to Otis Farm?" Remind him that I'm taking them there in July. Haven't heard anything about a reunion this year, but if there is one, maybe Kimby can come in for it and take them there (it is usually the weekend before Labor Day). He didn't mention the Rube-Goldberg elevator on this visit (yeah!), so don't bring it up. If he brings it up, remind him that it's probably not feasible because of building codes, etc.
"Where is the dipstick that I special-ordered for the Skid Loader?" It is in the right place on the Skid Loader, I put it there when it came.
"There are big bills that need to be paid in the mail." No there aren't. I pay their bills every month and everything is fine with their finances. If you want to go through the mail, fine, but don't worry about anything in it or feel the need to pay anything -- it will only mess me up. Their taxes, business taxes, bills, etc. are all in order. I'll be back on July 9th and will pay everything then.
"No one ever told me I couldn't drive." That's right, but he shouldn't drive and he knows it. And I really don't think he wants to.

Things Mom obsesses about:
"What day of the week is it?" I (and their helpers) always cross out the past days on both their calendar and the Senior Center Meals on Wheels calendar so they know what day it is, plus the day-of-the-week clock is above the couch and does work, if they think to look at it
"What is Dad saying?" He is hard to understand and does ramble, and it takes a bit of thinking to figure out what he is talking about. Mom has no patience with this and will interupt mid-sentence, causing Dad to completely lose his train of thought. We're not going to change this behavior, though.
"Where's Nellie?" She doesn't go far and is usually in one of three places -- the chair in the corner of the living room, the bedroom next to Mom's side, or at the side of the couch.
Nellie Barking. Nellie barks whenever there is food being eaten. The citronella collar kind of works for her. Maybe R***and T** can get her better trained with it. KIMBY - BE SURE to bring the collar and some citronella and the extra battery to the cabin so R*** can try to train Nellie with it. All are in a plastic bin on the table at home.

Things Nellie obsesses about:
Food
Food
More Food
Being outside when she is inside
Being inside when she is outside
Having a hedgehog to chew on in the car
Making sure car windows are thoroughly licked
Oh, and food!

Hope this helps!
[/spoiler]

Am I not fortunate to have such a wonderful sister keeping a handle on things?

Jun 9, 2012, 5:01pm, kerouac2 wrote:

Your sister is great, Kimby.

Yes, I may not have appreciated her when we were growing up, but I sure do NOW!

« Last Edit: Jun 9, 2012, 5:04pm by kimby »