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Post by Deleted on Apr 2, 2009 10:29:44 GMT
I finished reading Bee Season last night Bixa,great read,Thanks
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Post by Kimby on Apr 3, 2009 18:19:58 GMT
Was a segment about Obsessive Hoarding Syndrome on Today Show the other morning. The woman was so dedicated to her stuff and other stuff she rescued that her house was literally filled up and she moved her bed to the garden.
Fortunately my case is much milder. We can still live in our house normally, though my "filing system" IS breaking down and I am having more trouble locating things that I saved "for future reference"...
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Post by Deleted on Apr 7, 2009 22:03:21 GMT
A very lovely woman who lives in the neighborhood and also has a consignment clothing shop also in the neighborhood took a fall (tripped over a pile of hangers in her shop) and broke her arm. I've known her for years and was very concerned about her especially in light of my own physical woes of late. I gathered up a bouquet of sweet peas and hobbled over to see her. Mind you,I had never been to her home but judging by the amount of stuff she has in her shop I kind of had an inkling that she probably lived in a similar mode. I was totally blown away when she opened the door,plaster cast and sling and invited me "in" her abode. There was stuff from floor to ceiling in all the rooms as far as the eye could see. I was so overwhelmed by it all and became claustrophobic at the mere sight of it all. There was barely a path to go from room to room.I begged off a cup of coffee and visit because I was that overwhelmed. When I was leaving she thanked me for the flowers and said"they're so beautiful,I'm going to keep them forever". I believed her. I returned to my home which suddenly appeared as a Zen temple .
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Post by Kimby on Apr 16, 2009 22:25:32 GMT
There was a promo on TV for a show called "Buried in Treasures" that blames hoarding on 3 tendencies in the hoarder: A tendency to see their stuff as an extension of themselves. A feeling of responsibility to see that nothing is wasted. Being paralyzed by decision-making.
Unfortunately, I see these traits in myself.
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Post by rikita on Apr 17, 2009 7:47:39 GMT
yeah from those tendencies it looks like i am a potential hoarder (and the mess around me seems to confirm it).
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Post by spindrift on Apr 17, 2009 7:53:02 GMT
It gives me the shivers to read the above stories. Only yesterday I finally forced myself to clean out a large kitchen cupboard that was full of my daughter's stuff, years old, like tins of slimming soups(!) and old packets of pasta and lentils etc. There was too much stuff for the binmen to cart away so I've loaded the rest into the boot of my car ready to take it to the dump. Unfortunately I've spilled some of the red lentils and old sugar over the carpet of my car and so this means more work and hassle to clean it. One job seems to make another.
I'm gradually cleaning out papers from my filing cabinet and the next big sort-out will be in my bedroom cupboards. I'm getting ready for something, for sure, but I don't know what. I'm sick and tired of mess and hoarding. I'm not a hoarder but when my cupboards fill up then I have to make space. It does take a lot of willpower to start the job.
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Post by Kimby on Apr 17, 2009 14:23:30 GMT
Can I have some of your willpower, spindrift? My packrat tendencies are the only thing my husband would change about me.
Bigger breasts wouldn't hurt his feelings, either. ;-)
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Post by bazfaz on Apr 17, 2009 16:12:43 GMT
In 1992 when we first moved to France it was all done in a hurry. My ex had a job in London and had to work out her notice. Since I worked at home it was left to me to clear our house of 26 years of accumulated stuff. I made trip after trip to the tip (known as recycling centre - huh) as well as charity shops.
Eventually when my ex was ready to help she announced she would start by clearing the attic. I've already done that. She went up to have a look and it was empty. What happened to all the boxes of papers? she demanded. Now you have to understand that my ex was a strong supporter of the local church and there were boxes of fifteen year old rotas for the children's group, agendas for ancient church council meetings as well as old newsletters and appeals for money for a new sound system etc. This stuff was mixed up with tattered magazines our daughter had had aged 5. There were out of date clothes and seed catalogues. There were letters from the electricity board and the gas people for problems solved a decade before. There were quotes from builders and plumbers and electricians for jobs they never did. Do you get my drift? It was all mixed up, a dozen large boxes of it. I took them all to the tip a fortnight ago. I told her.
But my share certificates were somewhere in those boxes, she wailed.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2009 17:12:19 GMT
As onlyMark would say: Oh dear.
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Post by gringalais on Apr 17, 2009 21:36:13 GMT
Can I have some of your willpower, spindrift? My packrat tendencies are the only thing my husband would change about me. Bigger breasts wouldn't hurt his feelings, either. ;-) I'm good at throwing out other people's stuff, want me to pay a visit?
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Post by Kimby on Apr 18, 2009 3:32:54 GMT
Sure! But you can only throw things out if you have my permission. For each object.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2009 4:55:35 GMT
I am learning slowly but surely to throw away bad photographs from the past. Back when both film and developing were expensive, most people would hang on to even some of their worst photos.
It is really hard to do with family photos -- there is a feeling of betraying the family somehow.
Younger generations who have only known digital photos will probably not have this problem, or at least not nearly as bad.
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Post by bazfaz on Apr 18, 2009 7:42:40 GMT
I don't think this quite counts as hoarding but it follows on from K's mention of photos. Recently we went to a nephew's wedding in England. The "official" photographer was much in evidence there. Now he has posted on the internet his photos for us to browse and buy. There are 600. Does he seriously expect anybody but the couple and their mothers to look at all that lot? Can he not choose what in his professional opinion is the best of the nearly identical 15 of the couple signing the register?
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Post by spindrift on Apr 18, 2009 15:58:38 GMT
If anyone went through my papers and filing cabinet and threw things out without telling me, I'd be furious and would probably never speak to them again.
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Post by rikita on Apr 19, 2009 21:26:03 GMT
oh yes photo hoarding is another of my things... i have loads of photo albums, i keep every photo i take. one of my self-documentary needs... just that now since i got a digital camera that one takes away only space on the computer, but the old ones are still all there.
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Post by spindrift on Apr 19, 2009 22:02:24 GMT
As Riki speaks of digital cameras - I must admit to hoarding the XP cards for my cameras. I tend to buy new ones from cheap suppliers rather than delete, or re-format, the cards...just in case my computer fails.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 22, 2009 13:28:28 GMT
I had some well meaning persons "clean" for me some years back when I was sick in the hospital. Some very personal things got tossed and I get really pissed just thinking about it. Where to draw the line?
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Post by rikita on Apr 22, 2009 20:49:08 GMT
oh. that is mean... couldn't they just put the things they think should get chucked into a box, so you can go through them and make sure nothing you really want to keep is in there? well i understand you being pissed about it, i would be too.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 22, 2009 20:56:21 GMT
I can't imagine any exterior person allowing themselves to throw away my personal items of any sort. Even if old newpapers are lying around, they should be put in a box or something. Think of how many times you set aside a newspaper or magazine because there is something you want to cut out or copy down.
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Post by Kimby on Apr 23, 2009 16:22:59 GMT
Dangerous territory, K2. Setting aside whole newspapers because you want to read or clip something in them is a major factor in clutterers having towering piles of papers reaching to the ceiling.
I would love to be able to do as they advise: handle each piece of paper only once. Then act, file or toss (recycle). Unfortunately, once a piece of paper joins a pile, it never gets acted upon...
But perhaps you were teasing, and literal me couldn't see it.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 23, 2009 17:13:12 GMT
No, I was serious, but don't worry about the newspapers piling up in my place. If I don't remember why I kept a newspaper or magazine, I don't go leafing through it to find out -- it goes in the trash. I remember the important stuff, and if I don't remember it, it wasn't important.
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Post by Kimby on Apr 23, 2009 17:45:15 GMT
I wasn't worried about you, K2, I was worried about me!
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Post by spindrift on Apr 23, 2009 21:13:47 GMT
The only thing I'm really worried about is clearing out my clothes cupboard. As I only wear the items in the front, there must be hundreds of clothes never worn or worn a long time ago. I cleared out my shoes recently. I took two binbags of them to the charity place.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 23, 2009 21:24:39 GMT
I recently filled six large garbage bags with useless clothing (some of it never worn) and diligently put them in the charity bin next to the church, but when I look into my closet, I feel as though I may have imagined it all -- there is as much stuff as ever, and I can see lots of items that I will never wear, so why didn't they go in those bags?
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Post by spindrift on Apr 23, 2009 21:33:00 GMT
That is the question I ask myself.
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Post by rikita on Apr 23, 2009 22:04:04 GMT
i wondered today whether i should throw out two old phones i have that i replaced long ago, but decided to keep them "just in case". same for various half-broken bagpacks.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 23, 2009 22:06:34 GMT
Keep the old phones in the bagpacks.
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Post by rikita on Apr 24, 2009 6:11:48 GMT
a very good idea. i also have a few old mobile phones, but at least one of them has a reason - i bought it in south america, as i couldn't use my normal one there, so i am keeping it in case i return to south america.
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Post by lagatta on Apr 26, 2009 13:40:43 GMT
congratulations on filling the binbags. Moving a couple of years ago greatly reduced the number of not-worn clothes, but I have other things to get rid of. I have some pretty brass plates/trays from Morocco that frankly I am sick of polishing, so I'll be taking them to a charity. They don't seem to "go" in my current abode.
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Post by spindrift on Apr 26, 2009 14:21:43 GMT
It was lucky that yesterday I forced myself to drive to the dump with the old kitchen rubbish....as I was unloading the car I spied my digital camera USB lead in the car boot. I had scooped it up with the rubbish. I had been hunting high and low in the house for it...I never expected it to be in the rubbish.
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