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Post by fumobici on Oct 16, 2009 23:09:59 GMT
I'm a dog owner and you couldn't get any gossip out of me with a mule, a prybar, a Dodge PowerWagon and a comealong.
Of course my cat would tell you everything.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 17, 2009 0:21:55 GMT
I have one dog and 3 cats. Can't say I can make the connection. Although,the sharing of neighborhood news and I suppose gossip included would seem natural in a small neighborhood with many people walking their dogs at the same time of day,early a.m. and evenings. I don't see too many people walking their cats about so I guess they're out of the loop. There are definitely some harpies about that one can easily identify and walk on the other side of the street and avoid. Easier to do in a city I would imagine then out in the country where you are Kimby.
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Post by Kimby on Oct 17, 2009 16:04:24 GMT
Yes, and even though I can avoid the gossipers, I can't prevent them from gossipping about ME, can I?
The guy with the two little yap dogs has even stopped strangers passing by and told them unflattering (and not accurate) things about us. Which we found out when the "stranger" turned out to be a co-worker of my husband's. Oops - busted!
On other occasions, I have had him tell me - in an altered but still recognizeable form - something that I had mentioned to him a while back. He had forgotten who had said it to him, and was repeating it back to me in its new incarnation. Like the little kids' game "telephone" only with potential real repercussions.
One neighbor's 19 year old daughter was quite sick for months, and shortly after that the mother had taken on the job of providing day care for her pastor's granddaughter. The rumor mill started asserting that the baby was actually the teenager's new child, that she hadn't really been sick, just pregnant. No one asked the mother or daughter if it was true, they just passed it around. Fortunately, I was able to set them straight.
Gossip sucks! Though it sure is irresistable.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 28, 2009 21:15:55 GMT
I have always ignored my neighbors, but I lived vicariously through my father in Florida in terms of knowing everything about the neighbors there. He knew the neighbors on each side of the house and also the neighbors over the back fence. He even knew the neighbors across the street, both the direct neighbors and the diagonal neighbors.
He was a friendlier man that I could have ever imagined and chatted with all of them. When he died, all of them came to say how much they regretted his passing and what a wonderful person he was. It was normal for me not to recognize who they were, since I lived thousands of miles away, but my mother didn't know most of them either, since she was never sociable (a trait passed down to her son).
My father accepted everyone and was completely blind to racial and ethnic differences, as evidenced by how close he was to the final neighbors on the left, an innumerable Puerto Rican family, particularly young José, who would have repulsed most Anglo Americans of my parents' generation. He and José got along because they both liked to work on motors and other mechanical things, and José was always coming over to ask for advice. He had tattoos everywhere, the spiderwebs on the elbows, the scorpions on his neck, other motifs all over his chest and back, as well as nipple rings, eyebrow piercings and other rings through his lips. He and his wife were the ones who brought food over for my parents when they were incapable of feeding themselves.
The night before I took my mother back to France, he and his wife came over to say goodbye. My mother hugged both of them and burst into tears (something she did not do when my father died) and said she would never forget them. Of course with Alzheimer's in full bloom, she has forgotten them, she has even forgotten my father, she has not forgotten me or the dog they had for 12 years.
I will never forget the neighbors if only because of my father.
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Post by lola on Dec 23, 2009 3:09:12 GMT
The people in the next house hold onto neighbor grudges with Irish tenacity, lasting 55 years and more. Due to a conflict between their wind chimes and my husband's personality plus hypersensitive hearing, we are now on the list of those who must be snubbed. (After an initial loud scolding in the street.) I spent hours brooding over the situation, building up lists of grievances, thinking of strategies.
Sunday, inspired by the example of a checker at the supermarket, I decided to love them and let it all go. Very liberating.
Monday I saw the woman of the house. I called her name in a friendly way and she looked over expecting me to be someone she liked. Before her expression changed I said, "I love you guys anyway." She blinked a couple of times and then turned away. I walked on, feeling much better.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 23, 2009 3:19:24 GMT
Good for you Lola! Is sometimes hard to do but I often feel that those who are miserable need not make me miserable too. Interferes too much with my daily creativity and sense of well being. I always tell people "I just want to grow old gracefully where I live" and therefore,want to be "like Switzerland" when it comes down to neighborhood bullshit.
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Post by lola on Dec 23, 2009 3:31:58 GMT
Good policy, casimira. All the hours I've spent fretting about people could have been much better spent.
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Post by fumobici on Dec 23, 2009 20:57:21 GMT
Keeping love in your hearts for those who harbor ill feelings towards you is so important.
It drives the bastards crazy.
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Post by lola on Dec 23, 2009 21:51:08 GMT
You got that right, fumobici. If I hadn't been so chock full of benevolence I might have enjoyed my neighbor's look of blank dismay.
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Post by Kimby on Dec 24, 2009 21:37:44 GMT
(I misread benevolence as "beverages", lola, and immediately (mis)understood the love you felt for your neighbors!)
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Post by Deleted on Jan 4, 2010 13:31:42 GMT
I was just thinking that I moved into my building in 1992 when there was only one other apartment occupied (the rest was just being renovated or still in a state of ruin). The couple who lived in the other apartment moved out when they had a baby, and that makes me the senior resident of the building.
I guess that's why everybody strangely defers to my opinion when something must be decided.
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Post by Kimby on Jan 11, 2010 18:10:05 GMT
the "mayor" of the building, eh?
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Post by suzanneschuelke on Jan 18, 2010 12:29:11 GMT
I live in a suburban neighborhood with small lots. Six of our lots make sort of a pie slices backyard (although we own property separately). We've been here 15 years - but I've heard since that the neighbors were terrified when they heard that a couple without children were moving in since there is no way that children playing can avoid one lawn. Fortunately I don't care and get along fine with all of the neighbors. I'm close with only a couple - but cordial with all.
My only bad neighbor was in my first house. Houses were close together and most people didn't have driveways (we did - but for one car and no garage so it was often easier to leave one car in the street). On day my new across the street neighbor who I had never met knocked on my door and started screaming at me for parking in front of his house. No intro - he started out screaming. After a bit he said his girlfriend was pregnant and it was hard for her to walk. I said (never lost my temper - I think I was too startled) that if he said please I would say yes. He couldn't even hear me and kept yelling and I kept saying I will say yes as soon as you say please. He must have wound down for air because eventually he heard me and did it. He even said "we must have a beer sometime" - we didn't but I successfully ignored him for the year or so until we moved.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 18, 2010 15:35:44 GMT
suzzane, those are the kind of neighbors that I've had in the past, sometimes a lot worse. I've lived in apartments, houses, a hostel, motels, a trailer, to name a few, but I have to say that I prefer it where I am over all the other places I've lived in in the past. Probably because I hardly ever see my neighbors and I enjoy the wide open spaces around here, I'n surrounded by thousands of acres of forest land, and it suits me.
I do know my nieghbors quite well however, being a small town, people get to know each other pretty quickly, even though they don't bump into each other every day. Being the only Indian person in my little town, people instantly recognize me, and as my bf works for the Police, most people know him too.
So different from where I was living before. I still got to know my neighbors when I lived in the city, but didn't have much choice but be in constant contact with them. The woman next door would knock on my door about 10 times a day (no kidding), I did get used it eventually though.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 18, 2010 17:34:01 GMT
Being the only Indian person in my little town, people instantly recognize me, and as my bf works for the Police, most people know him too. So, the area is full of criminals?
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Post by bazfaz on Jan 18, 2010 18:26:10 GMT
Just as well Grecian isn't on this site or their would be joke's about policeman's truncheons.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 18, 2010 18:56:18 GMT
Being the only Indian person in my little town, people instantly recognize me, and as my bf works for the Police, most people know him too. So, the area is full of criminals? ;D You'd be surprised! The thing is the main highway here has a lot of traffic from the US and back, as well as from other nearby towns, so we get more than our fair share of crime, at least more than you would expect from a small town like this. I haven't been affected by it personally though, but then again I don't live on the highway or one of the main roads. Baz, it looks like Grecian has vanished, he did used to make me laugh at times.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 28, 2010 9:48:59 GMT
I have a neighbor who lives in the adjacent house. I'm really quite fond of her and went to bat for her so to speak when there was an issue with a roommate of hers and the landlady asked us our opinion as to who was the better tenant. In the last month however,she has taken to having cell phone conversations outside on her side porch late at night. With the window open,I can hear every single word.(The side porch is right below our bedroom window!!).
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2010 1:06:51 GMT
Last evening on the way out for the evening I had to stop for fuel. My neighbor from across the street from us works at the gas station/convenience store. As we were chatting,in comes her niece,neither had seen each other since Hurricane Katrina(2005) as the niece was in exile since then in Texas somewhere. I took this picture for them and have their permission to share here with y'all.Hope you enjoy the moment as much as I did.
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Post by bixaorellana on Feb 1, 2010 1:41:43 GMT
~ weep ~
Oh how perfectly wonderful! I love the expression on the taller woman's face. Is she your neighbor?
And speaking of weeping, after admiring the great picture, I looked through the window behind them & almost keeled over from homesickness.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2010 1:51:45 GMT
Yes,the taller woman in yellow is my neighbor.
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Post by lola on Feb 1, 2010 3:14:08 GMT
They are adorable. The joy shines out.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 9, 2010 2:47:24 GMT
My" cell phone" neighbor is talking louder and louder.... . I really do not want to hear this woman's sometimes seemingly intimate conversations. I am in a quandary here...
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Post by bixaorellana on Feb 9, 2010 3:32:38 GMT
Take a portable player out to the balcony. When she gets on the phone, crank up the music. Do this every time. She may get the hint, or she may just have to take her conversations inside to get away from your music.
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Post by bixaorellana on Feb 9, 2010 3:44:27 GMT
All of my neighbors seem pretty okay, except for the jackass right behind me. He has this huge monstrosity of a house that's butted up to my bedroom, bathroom, & dining room walls. He owns a company that handles dried chiles and other foodstuffs. He has an 18-wheeler that he kept leaving right in front of my house with the motor running. It would chug away for a half hour or more, filling my house with noise and fumes. I finally went over to ask them to please do something about it. His hag wife came to the door and snottily told me that was why they moved out to the country -- so they could do stuff like that. WTF? Then he came to the door and began to curse me and yell at me, changing to English cursing (which he was doing wrong). The up side of this was that they never left the truck in front of my house again, perhaps because they fear vengeance.
Because the houses are concrete, I never hear these neighbors -- only if they're using power tools or a hammer, or if the kid really cranks up some music. I never hear their tv set or any voices, though. This afternoon I was in my bedroom and heard the asshole go off again. He was having a major tantrum, with stuff being thrown and yelling so loudly I could hear it through the walls of the two houses. What a turd. Luckily I never have to have any contact with them.
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Post by spaceneedle on Feb 9, 2010 7:29:03 GMT
I live on wooded acreage in the middle of nowhere but I have gotten to know a couple of my neighbors. When you are living where I am, you need to know somebody in an emergency, because emergency personnel are going to take a long time to get here. I know the couple down the road well, they are old enough to be my parents but we get together for drinks OFTEN. Going in the other direction there is a federal law enforcement dude that I know also. We joke that between the four properties on our road there are probably more firearms than people. We need them more for protection from animals than anything. It is not uncommon in the summer to have black bears saunter onto the property in search of pic-i-nic baskets in the form of fresh garbage in the cans outside. But the bears are not a danger, they are very afraid of people. We do also get the occasional cougar or bobcat and those you have to be worried about. I'm sure though that as human animals we are the annoying creatures in the neighborhood to them-- vs. the other way around.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 9, 2010 7:46:46 GMT
My" cell phone" neighbor is talking louder and louder.... . I really do not want to hear this woman's sometimes seemingly intimate conversations. I am in a quandary here... Maybe she just needs a box of Q-tips.
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Post by spaceneedle on Feb 9, 2010 7:47:48 GMT
I was just thinking about neighbors and one old neighbor of mine came to mind. I went from very urban to very rural a number of years ago, and this person that comes to mind was a neighbor when I lived in the city.... She was in her mid 30s at that time and a single mother of a boy that was about 7 and out of control. She lived downstairs from me and the noise was awful- he would run up and down the floor day and night and the walls would shake. She herself was a sight to behold. Piles of makeup, bleached blonde hair, and very large breast implants on a tiny framed body. She would wear clothes that were too tight, lots of animal prints and not really appropriate for her age... One of the other neighbors used to joke that she might be a retired stripper... She had a revolving door on her bedroom and the guys just would come in and out. (No pun intended ) I personally don't care if she has a good time with five guys a night, as long as it does not bother me... but in the summer she liked leaving the window open which was directly below mine and above the people below HER. The couple below had small children and it was not uncommon when this gal was 'entertaining' to hear graphic language from her while she was in the 'act' coming from the bedroom through the open window. Not much phases me but some of the stuff was hard to ignore. Once it was so bad that the downstairs neighbor actually confronted her the following day and told her that she did not appreciate having to listen to the porn audio. No one here has AC (you really don't need it) so if it's hot for a day or two in the summer, you have no choice but the have the windows open and that was when we would hear the show from her place. (Nowadays someone would likely record it and let it go viral on the internet ) This gal also used to go to the pool at the co-op wearing the tiniest bikini possible with thong bottom and would shamelessly undo her bikini top so it was almost falling off and/or just openly oogle men who were there with their female partners. It was almost like she needed the attention, it was pretty strange. I think she is still living there and I shudder to think that her child is now an adolescent and is probably HELL on wheels. So glad I am not living there any longer
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Post by Deleted on Feb 9, 2010 10:16:40 GMT
I am getting a mental image of Sylvia Miles in the movie "Heat" with Joe Dallessandro.
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Post by spindrift on Feb 9, 2010 17:05:08 GMT
I have a terraced house with neighbours on both sides. Recently I've been hearing lots of crying.....the naughty girl of ten who wails like a 4 year old trying to get her way with her parents ....and the woman on the other side who occasionally shouts, swears and cries at her partner at night.
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