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Post by gringalais on Mar 23, 2009 16:27:56 GMT
What is common where you live as far as living on your own once you finish schooling? When did you first live on your own?
Here in Chile, a lot of people live with their parents until getting married. It is starting to change, however. As in a lot of places, people are marrying later or not getting married, so I know several people who went to live on their own or with friends inn their late 20's or older. Also, living together without marrying is becoming more common.
Being from the US, in college, I spent vacations at my parents' but nothing else. Once I finished college I never lived with them again.
I was just thinking of this because a friend just took a job near Viña del Mar. She is 30 and still lives with her parents here in Santiago. She is really freaked out and conflicted about In fact, she now got another job offer in Santiago, and is thinking maybe she'll take that one instead.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 23, 2009 17:38:27 GMT
I left for university when I was 16 (almost 17) and lived in student housing for the first year. The second year I shared an apartment with my brother and then the 3rd year I lived alone. I got my degree in 3 years because I quickly realized that I was not much interested in traditional classes anymore. Rather than dropping out, I accelerated and went to classes all through summer. And so, shortly after my 20th birthday, I finished my formal schooling and changed continent forever. Ha ha, how stupid. A degree in political science from one country is totally worthless if you change country.
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Post by bazfaz on Mar 23, 2009 21:39:15 GMT
I was somewhat like Kerouac. I went to university in South Africa when I was 16 1/2. But I lived at home. I abandoned that university when I was called up to serve in the army - driving a tank - in defence of apartheid. I went to university in England when I was 19 and never lived with my parents after that.
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Post by Jazz on Mar 23, 2009 23:13:05 GMT
Like Baz and Kerouac, my 'life at home' ended when I was 16 1/2. I had been brought up in the country in northern Ontario and left to go to university in 'the city' (Toronto). I knew no one in Toronto. At the same time, my parents moved 2,000 miles away to live in another country, Florida, USA. Thus ending all financial and most emotional support, although I did see them for 2-3 days a year in the summer for 15 years when they passed through Toronto on vacation. My father died and I was then able to be with my mother more and eventually she moved back to Toronto and made her home in the apartment in my house for 10 wonderful years, until she died.
In first year university I lived in a student residence, then shared houses with friends in the second and third years.
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Post by spindrift on Mar 23, 2009 23:21:33 GMT
I have painful memories of Ireland and living alone. I have blanked out a lot of them. I can't talk about it.
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Post by happytraveller on Mar 24, 2009 6:34:08 GMT
I moved out at the age of 24. I suppose that's about the average age for people here to leave their parents, maybe a couple of years younger. Most people have a university close by so there's no need to move out. Safes a lot of money.
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Post by tillystar on Mar 24, 2009 14:27:52 GMT
I went to Greece for 6 months when I was 16 and when I came home I moved out permanently to live with my boyfriend "we want to be togevver". Ha! Well that didn't last but I ran off to Uni to escape the psycho so never lived with my Mum again...
I only ever lived alone once and it was only for a few months; its something I would like to have tried, having a place that was only mine.
Most people here tend to leave home either when they go to Uni or in early 20s. LOts of our Spanish friends have stayed at home (except for going off travelling) until their late 20s/early 30s when they can then afford a house as they have saved a good deposit. It seems to be common in Spain but much rarer here.
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Post by rikita on Mar 24, 2009 14:54:58 GMT
i moved out of my mom's house at age 20, when i started university (having spent a year abroad before when i was 17/18 but staying with families there), one of my brothers moved out at 17 to first do a "diaconical year" in another town, then have his apprenticeship in another town, the other brother is 22 and still living at home with no plans to move out in the next years.
i would say, here, most people move out when they start university, which is usually at about 19 or 20. those that don't go to university, might stay at home during their apprenticeship (which depending on what type of school they graduated from they might start at 16 or at 19 or 20), but some also move out during that... some people of course also stay at home during university...
in my case, i considered staying at home, for financial reasons, but my mom said she wants me to move out so i can "learn to live on my own" before i move in with a boyfriend or husband - she said it was a mistake she moved right from her parents to my dad. well, then when i graduated my parents had just separated anyway, so by then i wanted to move out anyway as the situation at home wasn't that great...
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Post by bixaorellana on Mar 24, 2009 16:27:36 GMT
Like everyone who has answered above, I didn't live with my parents after university and then going off to work.
Boy, is it different here ~ no one ever leaves home. I know one couple who were still living with the husband's mother after they had three children. After the wife had an automobile accident and was recovering, they moved ....... to her parents house.
When a friend invited me to her son's wedding, I asked what the couple needed so I could get them a gift. After she said that a gift wasn't necessary, I answered that of course a couple just starting out would need all kinds of things. Uh ... culture reality check. That couple is living in the family house along with mom, uncle, and grandmother, so the citrus juicer I got them is probably pretty superfluous.
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Post by gringalais on Mar 25, 2009 19:05:44 GMT
Well, the friend decided to bail on the job in Viña and take the one in Santiago. She doesn't feel ready to live that far from her family.
bixa - en Mexico do you know if adult children that live with their parents help with the household expenses? Here it really seems to vary, some help out, others don't give anything even if they have a decent job.
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Post by rikita on Mar 25, 2009 19:49:01 GMT
yeah knew a lot of people staying at home quite long in south america too - though it varied... like, my argentinian friend and her siblings moved out once they started university, simply because they wanted to go to university in bs. as. ... but they have an apartment there where they lived togehter at first...
my boyfriend in peru was living at home (and i suppose sitll is) at the age of thirty - in his case it also has financial reasons though, on a peruvian minimum wage you can't live by yourself. was funny though as he was also a bit conservative and didn't want to introduce a girl to his parents unless he was engaged to her... he took me home once though, and i stayed the night - but secretely, his parents never knew that i was there...
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Post by bixaorellana on Mar 25, 2009 22:21:19 GMT
I think it varies here, too, Gringalais. People do think that my son, who is obviously rolling in wealth since he lives in the US, should be supporting me. But I don't think that means that all adult children still at home here are doing their parts. I think that many mothers can't bear to have their babies leave them ever. It's a great deal for guys especially, as they can change into freshly ironed clean clothes at will and have their food just as they like it. I know one guy who was living at home, got married (to a woman with a profession), and they both moved into his mother's house. The marriage lasted one month.
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Post by gringalais on Mar 27, 2009 17:48:04 GMT
Bixa - thinking about it, I know a few people that help their moms out monetarily, giving them a significant amount every month and they all live on their own and have been on their own earlier than average.
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Post by Kimby on Mar 27, 2009 21:15:21 GMT
Pity the woman who marries a man that still lives with his mother. Better hope she majored in "home economics" and loves being a domestic goddess!
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2009 21:20:00 GMT
So many of my female colleagues continue to lament the lack of domestic skills (or the desire to exercise them) of their mama's-boy husbands. I think that both members of a couple should be required to take some sort of test before being allowed to get married and live independently.
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Post by gringalais on Mar 27, 2009 21:24:47 GMT
I have seen the same, kerouac. I know more than a few women here that married total momma's boys and then whine to anyone (except their husbands) about how they never do anything around the house or help with the kids, etc. I don't know how they didn't see that before they got married.
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Post by Kimby on Mar 27, 2009 21:48:59 GMT
Seems the countries with long siestas are the ones where the sons never leave home.
Why would they, with Mama's cooking to go home to at lunch time?
How's a wife to compete with that?
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Post by hwinpp on Mar 30, 2009 4:38:05 GMT
LOL! Some insightful stuff there, Kim! There were three of us at home. My sister (1 year younger than me) left at 19 to go to university. She never again lived at home after that. My brother (5 years younger) also left at 19 to go to university. I left at 20 to join the army after bumming around for a year after school. I've never gone back either. But I do stay at both my sister's and my brother's places if I'm in Germany or Vietnam. I see my mother all over the place. Here, at my brother's or at my sister's. She's sort of adopted her German grandson and says she needs to take him on her trips. He doesn't seem to mind
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