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Post by Deleted on May 31, 2009 18:41:52 GMT
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.
Meaning: A physical attack may injure me but a verbal attack cannot injure me.
How do you react to insults? Do they make you instantly hot under the collar or do you laugh them off? Does it depend on who is insulting you?
I must once again thank my mother for teaching me about insults at a very early age. I grew up in a very backward semi-rural area where anybody who was "different" was almost automatically bad -- whether it be race, religion, origin, opinion or anything else that can make you different from the majority.
As a child, I was constantly attacked because my mother was a foreigner, and I think that most of us will agree that an attack on one's mother is one of the most distressing things than can happen to a child.
But my mother very nicely explained that ignorant people often have extremely stupid opinions, and that I should just ignore any insults about such things -- as well as plenty of other things. To this day, I continue to be impervious to insults, and they absolutely never hurt me.
I think I may be in a minority, because I see ugly incidents in response to insults almost every day.
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Post by bixaorellana on May 31, 2009 19:01:08 GMT
They make me want to kill.
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Post by imec on May 31, 2009 20:45:48 GMT
Depending on the source (and the reason), they can hurt or amuse.
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Post by hwinpp on Jun 1, 2009 2:04:22 GMT
They make me want to kill. Depends a bit on the situation, who it is, what I'm feeling like. Usually I'm very calm and ignore everything. I'm more patient than most Asians I know. But if it's somebody who should know better, is blatantly flaunting rules and then goes on to insult me, it's like a switch. I start turning green... ;D |
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Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2009 5:47:02 GMT
I have seen in certain cases that it may have wiser to reply. Certain people become even more infuriated when they see their insult fall flat.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2009 18:00:04 GMT
It all depends on who is doing the insulting. Some people aren't worth getting upset over. Some people just make themselves look bad by insulting others, which is a good thing, and can be quite funny. The only time an insult would bother me, if the person doing it mattered to me, other then that, everyone else, may as well 'speak to the hand', and kiss my ass at the same time  |
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Post by rikita on Jun 1, 2009 23:24:22 GMT
as others say, depends who is saying it. also depends what they are saying, though...
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Post by happytraveller on Jun 2, 2009 6:20:23 GMT
Yes it does depend on who is saying it. Sometimes it hurts a lot and other times I just brush it off.
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Post by Jazz on Jun 2, 2009 6:49:27 GMT
If someone insults me with full awareness and intent to hurt me, this upsets me. How upset I become, if at all, depends on who is insulting me and why they have chosen to insult me.
To this day, I continue to be impervious to insults, and they absolutely never hurt me.I wonder about people such as Kerouac. If you are impervious to insults, does this mean that you freely insult others, 'assuming' that they also are not hurt? This is quite an ego-based assumption and, definitely, culturally limited. |
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Post by tillystar on Jun 2, 2009 7:16:22 GMT
Depends on who, what and why.
K - I remember my mum having that same conversation with my brother when he was about 7 or 8. He had been playing outside and she had heard him react to someone calling him names and called him in. After telling him it was "just words blah blah blah, now go and play nicely" he turned to walk off and said "stupid cow".
Of course my Mum whipped round "WHAT did you say" she boomed at him. "See Mum, it is annoying though isn't it?".
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Post by happytraveller on Jun 2, 2009 7:50:36 GMT
Tilly, what a smart little boy ! How did mum react to that ?
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Post by BigIain on Jun 2, 2009 15:21:32 GMT
Direct insults have to be quite clever to be hurtful, few people have the ability to do so. I get more bothered by insulting behaviour generally.
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Post by bixaorellana on Jun 2, 2009 15:36:05 GMT
Ha ~~ I'd hate to get into an argument with Tilly's brother. He must have really honed his innate skills by now.
Jazz, your response prompted me to re-read the OP, to which I'd responded rather flippantly (but somewhat truthfully).
In the realm of general insults, being able to consider the source & shrug them off is indicative of a healthy ego. After all, what does some yahoo's ignorant slur have to do with who we really are?
As several people have pointed out, however, insults from those close to you can hurt, or at least definitely rattle the ole cage.
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Post by hwinpp on Jun 3, 2009 3:46:57 GMT
Direct insults have to be quite clever to be hurtful, few people have the ability to do so. I get more bothered by insulting behaviour generally. I just realised it's the same with me. Generally I don't bother with people who insult me, actually they seldom do. Nobody's called me names or so for ages. It's the insulting behaviour that gets me. |
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Post by tillystar on Jun 3, 2009 12:46:40 GMT
Ah you saw the future! He spent many years honing those skills (mainly on me  ) and now he loves nothing better than arguing black is white and making you doubt yourself just for the sake of it. Drives me mental |
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Post by gyro on Jun 3, 2009 19:34:59 GMT
You didn't have far to go .....
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Post by lagatta on Jun 4, 2009 10:13:52 GMT
Tilly, is your brother a lawyer by any chance?
I get deeply hurt by insults. Is this a gender-related split?
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Post by traveler63 on Jun 4, 2009 16:13:05 GMT
Insults are a cowards way of feeling important. At least thats my take on it.
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Post by bixaorellana on Jun 4, 2009 16:45:25 GMT
Interesting take, T63. I never thought of that, but it makes sense that a person who feels inferior might well take lashing out as a way to boost his own ego.
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Post by gyro on Jun 4, 2009 19:34:48 GMT
or hers .........
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Post by bixaorellana on Jun 4, 2009 21:47:02 GMT
Have the girls been picking on you again?
(point taken though ~~ "... boost his or her own ego")
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Post by gyro on Jun 5, 2009 5:24:36 GMT
Was that an insult ?
But, in all serious, this thread is funny. Some of the replies are quite laughably holier-than-thou; it's like they have NEVER thrown an insult or two somebodies way. Ha !
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Post by BigIain on Jun 5, 2009 19:13:05 GMT
I can really dish it out on certain days, but it is generally half abusive and half funny.
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Post by gyro on Jun 5, 2009 19:20:21 GMT
Steady on, I, you can't admit to any halo slippage in this thread; it just ain't done ..... !
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Post by Deleted on Jun 5, 2009 19:21:32 GMT
This is an exaggeration of how I actually feel, but my reaction to an insult is sort of along the lines of:
"How can you be so ignorant to say such a thing? This proves that you are even more ignorant than I thought you were! Ha ha!"
Naturally, if the insulter does not even know me (e.g. "traffic incident"), I usually laugh even more.
Obviously, if some who knows me perfectly well comes out with a cutting remark, I do not consider it to be an insult but rather a mortal wound, and of course if it really hurts if means either that they are telling the truth or that you realize that even if it is not the truth, it looks like the truth to the rest of the world.
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) and now he loves nothing better than arguing black is white and making you doubt yourself just for the sake of it. Drives me mental 
