The importance of being nice
Mar 22, 2009 16:11:18 GMT
Post by Deleted on Mar 22, 2009 16:11:18 GMT
A lot of people seem to think that being nice is a sign of weakness and that the only way to survive is to be cynical and even cruel for reasons of self protection.
Being nice comes naturally to some people but not to everybody, so here are a few points that can be taken into consideration if you have any doubts about the importance of being nice.
1. "Me first" does not make you happy. The time for looking down on losers or glorifying your personal performance has passed. The world is in crisis at the moment and it has been proven that the persons with a killer attitude have taken the hardest fall. Hyper-egocentricty made people think that they didn't need anybody else. They were wrong.
The world is beginning to change again and a lot of people are hoping for a quality of life more respectful of the environment and of human relations. Humanity is a big part of sustainable development, and being nice will give you a strong foundation in this department.
2. Being nice changes the world around you. Maybe you can't prevent wars or stop the major injustice in society, but you can certainly influence the world right around you.
Paying attention to others, respecting your neighbors and colleagues and accepting the differences around you is much better than automatic rejection, and it is contagious. Just imagine for one moment how different the world would be if people stopped insulting each other about completely minor things.
3. It is sometimes a matter of survival. Health care, soup kitchens, tutoring and volunteer work are examples of institutionalized forms of solidarity, but they would not exist if people had not understood within themselves that solidarity improves the world and reduces the danger in it. Being nice and helping the people around you in small ways improves their lives and increases your personal security.
4. Being nice is the only way to create real personal ties. You don't make friends by being nasty. Sometimes just a smile is enough to make the other person want to listen to your sentence all the way to the end. That's one of the reasons that the news readers on television are taught to smile so much, because people prefer to listen to a smiling person rather than one with an unpleasant expression. It is just as important to listen to others and to really take into consideration what they are saying. Communication and mutual understanding are the foundations of friendship, so anything you can do ease the process is to your benefit.
Making nasty remarks for the fun (?) of it might create a circle of "snicker buddies" around you, but would you ever want to need to count on any of these people if you were in trouble?
5. Being nice pays off. Without going into mercantile calculations about what being nice will get you, it is well known that it is a win-win situation. When people in society do not feel rivalry, they stop competing and start cooperating. Everybody benefits. Professional managers learned long ago that praising employees for their efforts gets much better results than criticizing them. And hey, this works with children, too.
6. It is the opposite of weakness. Finding the gentlest words when something negative must be said or remaining calm in the face of aggression takes a certain amount of strength. There is always a way to put criticism into an acceptable formulation rather than wounding the other person unnecessarily.
7. It is also important to be nice to yourself. If you set unrealistic or impossible objectives, you are not doing yourself any good. You can be gentle with yourself without being hypocritical. You will live longer and lead a happier life if you are not living in constant personal disappointment or stress.
Being nice comes naturally to some people but not to everybody, so here are a few points that can be taken into consideration if you have any doubts about the importance of being nice.
1. "Me first" does not make you happy. The time for looking down on losers or glorifying your personal performance has passed. The world is in crisis at the moment and it has been proven that the persons with a killer attitude have taken the hardest fall. Hyper-egocentricty made people think that they didn't need anybody else. They were wrong.
The world is beginning to change again and a lot of people are hoping for a quality of life more respectful of the environment and of human relations. Humanity is a big part of sustainable development, and being nice will give you a strong foundation in this department.
2. Being nice changes the world around you. Maybe you can't prevent wars or stop the major injustice in society, but you can certainly influence the world right around you.
Paying attention to others, respecting your neighbors and colleagues and accepting the differences around you is much better than automatic rejection, and it is contagious. Just imagine for one moment how different the world would be if people stopped insulting each other about completely minor things.
3. It is sometimes a matter of survival. Health care, soup kitchens, tutoring and volunteer work are examples of institutionalized forms of solidarity, but they would not exist if people had not understood within themselves that solidarity improves the world and reduces the danger in it. Being nice and helping the people around you in small ways improves their lives and increases your personal security.
4. Being nice is the only way to create real personal ties. You don't make friends by being nasty. Sometimes just a smile is enough to make the other person want to listen to your sentence all the way to the end. That's one of the reasons that the news readers on television are taught to smile so much, because people prefer to listen to a smiling person rather than one with an unpleasant expression. It is just as important to listen to others and to really take into consideration what they are saying. Communication and mutual understanding are the foundations of friendship, so anything you can do ease the process is to your benefit.
Making nasty remarks for the fun (?) of it might create a circle of "snicker buddies" around you, but would you ever want to need to count on any of these people if you were in trouble?
5. Being nice pays off. Without going into mercantile calculations about what being nice will get you, it is well known that it is a win-win situation. When people in society do not feel rivalry, they stop competing and start cooperating. Everybody benefits. Professional managers learned long ago that praising employees for their efforts gets much better results than criticizing them. And hey, this works with children, too.
6. It is the opposite of weakness. Finding the gentlest words when something negative must be said or remaining calm in the face of aggression takes a certain amount of strength. There is always a way to put criticism into an acceptable formulation rather than wounding the other person unnecessarily.
7. It is also important to be nice to yourself. If you set unrealistic or impossible objectives, you are not doing yourself any good. You can be gentle with yourself without being hypocritical. You will live longer and lead a happier life if you are not living in constant personal disappointment or stress.
(all quite selfish really!!!)
